Yes Finally – I am Coming Out!
I have been avoiding this – but why?
It started the other day when a good friend of mine – Nikki – saw a post I put up on LinkedIn and text me to say she had been wondering what had been happening to me. As soon as I read her text I knew that other people would have been feeling the same way. You see I have been avoiding doing what I should have done months ago. I have been avoiding saying the words I needed to say, and I am not really sure why.
I think it is because of FOBJ
No, it’s not a Myers Briggs profile. It is the fear of being judged.
Here’s the thing – everyone has this FOBJ. We worry that people won’t like what we say or do, and so you change your behaviour – just in case
But the problem with that is, that you are not being authentic (one of my pet hates, how about you?). And so I need to put it right out there – I am sorry I have been hiding from the truth and not allowing myself to just be me.
Perhaps you have noticed a difference too. My weekly emails to you have been in a slightly different format, and you too may have wondered what was going on.
So here it is. Due to some inescapable, unavoidable and sad things that have happened to us personally over the last 12 months, we have found our personal priorities and goals have changed, and so we have mutually decided that we need to move forwards separately.
Jan needs to be nearer her family, and I too need to find more flexibility and balance in my business and family life – the Holy Grail of work/life balance! And, like most endings, there is some sadness as we have achieved some great stuff together and had fun doing it.
We also realised that life, and the people who need us are actually the most important thing. Aren’t they the reason we do most things? And our continued partnership wasn’t going to meet those needs. And so, we just have to move forwards.
We are friends and will always collaborate on projects into the future, in fact we have our next coffee and catch up tomorrow afternoon.
So, what was the mistake, and why was I hiding?
Well, I was a bit worried about putting out information that people might perceive negatively. I mean – everything is always pink and fluffy in our digital / social media world. And so I just avoided saying anything – which is daft, and more likely to case confusion!
To be clear – just so you know – I am continuing with the work that I always have done, but with my new company name (Think, Be, Do Leadership), and with more focus on technical experts. Technical experts who ned to become leaders, has always been my passion. As a trained engineer going through the ranks myself back I the day – I know how that feels.
I am actually very excited about this new iteration. I am the same me as I ever was – dedicated, passionate, down-to-earth and a say-it-like-it-is person. And I am now going to stand up and be counted as me in my new business – THINK BE DO Leadership. I have named it that way because I truly believe that you can’t change what you do, unless you change how you think and how you behave.
Getting conscious about that is one of the major starting points that I work with my clients on. So, here I am – The Director and Chief Impact Engineer of Think Be Do Leadership. Helping leaders to create the impact they desire to grow their careers and businesses.
I am happy, passionate and ready to allow myself to be me. And I would love to know what you think and how this situation might apply to you too?
Do you sometimes find yourself NOT saying the one thing that needs to be said? Do you avoid awkward subjects or conflict? Let me know how this has affected your business or career.
Have a great day and wish me well for Think Be Do Leadership !